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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in the instigator's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, March 28th, 2015
5:53 pm


From now my LJ is friends only... to stop curious eyes.

Comment to be added.

6 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Friday, February 22nd, 2008
6:19 pm
Hot list. pt. 2
I don't feel like any explanation is needed this time around.




Current Mood: amused
1 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Saturday, January 12th, 2008
11:39 pm
Hot list... for fun.
I never post here... but I am doing this because I feel like it.

I am completely shallow.



Current Mood: pleased
1 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Thursday, June 22nd, 2006
12:17 am
Best fucking day ever!
It's days like today that make me forget about work or responsibility and all the troubles of the world. When everything goes right... and it's odd because you wonder... where the hell did I go right? Karma must love me!

I really want to type everything it capital letters and in bold print... but I'll refrain... or try to.

So today my family went to NYC. I've never seen a broadway show, and they decided that it was about damn time that we went. This in itself made me really happy. So we go, and we decide to see The Producers. Needless to say... it was amazing. It was hilarious and everything was just... it was how I imagined it. But it is so much different in person. The lights, the actors, the dancing... fanfuckingtastic.

So after it was over, I was feeling pretty happy. It's hard not to after seeing something like that. We stop at a place, get some food, and start walking back to Penn Station.

Then I stop walking. I didn't know if I was imagining things and the heat was getting to me. But when passing people cleared out of the way, I realized I wasn't imagining it at all.

Rufus Wainwright was standing on the sidewalk talking to some lady who had far too much make up on. Rufus FUCKING Wainwright. I cannot even explain my adoration for him or his music. Everything he stands for and the messages he sends. I have loved him for quite a while. One of the few people who I've ever bothered buying every CD by. One of the few musicians I respect.

But there he was. Perfect. Gorgeous. And wonderfully gay. I don't know what to do at first. I was afraid to approach him because well... I don't even know what to say. So with a sheepish grin I walk up and say, "You're... Rufus Wainwright..." He smiles and says, "Yeah!" I mention adoring his music, and we talk briefly. I kind of zoned out because I kept thinking, "Am I imagining this?" But no.

So I ask him if he will sign something, and he is so polite and says, "Of course!" but I can't find a pen... luckily my dad had one. I have now confiscated this pen because it has Rufus cooties on it. But I don't have a damn thing for him to sign. So he gets out his wallet, looks through it, then pulls out a receipt. He says, "This is an art store receipt. So this will be extra personal." I laugh and say something like, "That's really appropiate..." because I was thinking about one of his songs. He laughs and nods, scribbling his name onto the back of the receipt and then hands me it and the pen. I thank him, exchange a few more words, then depart.

It was just... the MOST FUCKING RANDOM THING EVER. Walking down the street... then WHAM! Rufus Wainwright! He was amazing. I still can't even believe it.

So I look at the receipt afterwards... and at the bottom... in case anyone ever doubts that signature on the back... there are the little X's followed by the last four digits on his credit card, then underneath it says, "Wainwright, R."

Holy fucking shit. Rufus FUCKING Wainwright.
16 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Monday, January 23rd, 2006
3:59 pm
Stolen from Brian...

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:
7.1
Mind:
7
Body:
6.4
Spirit:
7.7
Friends/Family:
5.8
Love:
7.7
Finance:
4.8
Take the Rate My Life Quiz


Apparently I'm far more satisfied than what I was aware of. That's... well, insane.

Current Mood: bored
2 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Sunday, January 8th, 2006
6:28 pm
let's go down to the ozdust ballroom, we'll meet there later tonight...

I really have nothing to update about. Things have been going really well lately. Except for me being sick... but that's okay. Who cares? Haha.

Now I am going to share some songs from the fabulous musical The Last Five Years.

A Summer in Ohio

The Schmuel Song

Climbing Uphill

Nobody Needs to Know

Goodbye Until Tomorrow/I Could Never Rescue You

There really was no point to this. :)

I love you all! <3



Current Mood: sick
8 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Wednesday, January 4th, 2006
11:00 pm
Jesus Christ, I suck I suck I suck!

Sometimes it feels like in my attempts to make everyone happy, I only make everyone miserable. That's the last thing I want. I don't like feeling as though others have some sort of ill feelings towards me. But I don't know what to do.

It's kind of funny because I will constantly say, "I don't care..." and yet, that's a bit hypocritical. Because contrary to these words, I often care too much. In fact, I tend to worry and let things bother me. Things that I can't always mend or make better. This either makes me a great friend or a terrible friend. I always feel that in the end... I've still disappointed someone.

Despite popular belief, I am not clairvoyant. I cannot always tell what's wrong. It's difficult to always read people. I don't even know if it's always my fault.

But it probably is.

Sometimes I really suck. 

Well, The Producers was pretty amusing.



Current Mood: confused
3 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Wednesday, December 28th, 2005
1:31 am
good people never win...

It makes you wonder when things are going really well, when are they going to start going really shitty all over again?

Because things are going really well.

I'm probably going to go see The Producers on Thursday. :) Nathan Lane. <3



Current Mood: calm
4 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Sunday, December 11th, 2005
7:18 pm
so...

So it's over. It's been over for almost a week. No... it's been over for longer than that. It's funny how you think you have someone figured out, and then they proceed to screw you over. No, it's not funny. It isn't even amusing in the slightest. I'm only glad that I got to end it. How dare someone have the audacity to think that they can lie and take advantage of someone else. No one has the right to do that to anyone. It's complete and utter bullshit.

I was always a bit weary. I guess I know why now.

I could have never loved him. And even for a moment when I thought I might... I realized that feelings could be misplaced.

It was never him.



Current Mood: confused
12 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Monday, December 5th, 2005
1:57 pm
I am at the computer lab right now with my lover Molly. Huzzah! I just got shushed by the lady working here. I'm so effing loud.

Life as of lately has been... iffy. I am really lazy, and secretive so I am not sharing it. Not that anyone cares. Hah.

Current Mood: silly
6 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Tuesday, November 15th, 2005
9:23 pm
I never update this anymore.

I've noticed how distant I've become from everyone and everything. Things could be totally perfect, and I wouldn't even know it. I wish it wasn't like this. I don't even try anymore. What's the use? Even with the people who make an effort, I ignore it and just hide. But let's face it... who makes an effort anymore? I used to and it never did me any good. I guess other people know that it doesn't do jackshit.

I am so sick of people assuming that things are all right. They think my life is perfect and happy. Yeah, right. Fuck that. Fuck your assumptions. Nothing has ever been perfect. There is no such thing. It's all a facade. Guess what... if you think that your life sucks, then welcome to the goddamn fucking club. Everyone's life sucks. Get the hell over it. I cannot fix your life... not while I'm too busy attempting to put mine together, too.

I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY AND SELFISH FOR NO FUCKING REASON.

I'm sorry I'm such an asshole. I can't help it anymore.

These must be the difficult years.
3 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Saturday, October 29th, 2005
2:24 pm
BRIAN IS BACK! I missed him! YAY!

WOOT!
3 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Monday, October 24th, 2005
3:41 pm
I think my livejournal has died...
2 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Wednesday, October 12th, 2005
1:10 am
So. I will completely disregard my earlier post. I do know for sure now.

I still have butterflies in my tummy.

<3 It's been a wonderful day.

I love you all!

Current Mood: indescribable
i'll wait for you there
Tuesday, October 11th, 2005
2:41 pm
he's says, "i can't feel a thing, my dreams are so tight..."

It's seems like I only turn to livejournal to drain all the emotional crap that I've been holding inside these days. I don't feel like I can say it to anyone else. I don't like that feeling.

So I think she really noticed last night. It makes me feel like a home wrecker, only it was a non-existent home. There probably isn't even anything really there. No matter what people have said. But I'm sick of hearing about her depression. How cold am I? I'm sick of hearing about her broken heart that has yet to find a reason to really be broken. She, like me, knows nothing for a fact. I mean, I really can't judge things purely off of some kind of flirtatious interaction, can I? That would be foolish. I don't know anything. I hate that. I'm confused. The only thing I really know is theories and rumors. That's just... eh.

I'm tired of having to put up with this emotional bullshit. It's everywhere, and I can't escape it.

On a lighter note...

Latest Obsession:

The end.

I love you all. <3



Current Mood: worried
i'll wait for you there
Thursday, October 6th, 2005
12:00 am
[HAVE YOU EVER..]
been kissed..Yes.
lied to a friend..It was a long time ago.
dyed ur hairNope.
dressed punkI'll dress however the fuck I feel like.
kissed a girlHaha yes. But not like THAT.
saw something u didnt want toYes.
danced in the rainYes.
lied to ur parentsOf course.
went barefoot in the snowNope.
played hockeyYeah!
made ur own clothesI wish.
[IN THE LAST 24 HOURS..]
got in a fiteWhat the hell is a fite? Is it some sort of violent toy that you fly in the air?
took a showerYes.
gave a dirty look to someoneProbably.
cried=(Ehh.
did a cartwheelNope.
went to schoolYes.
shopped Nope.
dancedHell yes.
got sickEmotionally...
did something u regretI don't feel like regretting anything.
discovered something newYeah...
[IN SCHOOL YOU...]
run to class because ur always lateNo.
act perfectNo.
act hyperNo.
are a nerdProbably.
in band??No. It's college. You dumb hookers.
[RIGHT NOW UR..]
in ur pjsYes.
drinkinWater.
listening to musicYup.
watching a movieNo.
iming someone Yeah.
talkin on the foneNo.
eatingNo.
[CLOTHES..]
hot topic or abercrombie and fitchNeither.
thongs or briefsWhat the h?
boxers anyone?!?!Mm.
sweatpants or jeansJeans.
longsleeved shirts or short sleeveShort sleeve.
tube tops or tanksTanks.
[CURRENTLY .. ]
current clothesPajamas!
current moodConfused.
current musicThe Dresden Dolls.
current tasteNone...
current make-upI need to wash it off.
current thing I ought to be doingI don't know...
[ LAST PERSON .. ]
you huggedNate.
yelled atMyself for sucking at bowling.
IMed.I can't remember.
you touched...Nate.
[ EiTHER/0R .. ]
coffee or hot chocolateHot chocolate! Coffee is good, too.
big or littleWhat are we talking about here?
lace or satinBoth.
new or oldIt doesn't matter.
vogue or cosmopolitanNeither.
skirt or dressSkirt.
wool or cottonCotton.
[DO YOU..]
put on a "front"No.
have a crush on someoneSortofkindof.
if u got a tatoo where wud u get itOn my hip.
[RANDOM QUESTiONS..]
waht is the online symbol u use the mostI don't use symbols.
u have a boyfriend or girlfiendNo.
who's hotter, Josh Hartnett or Chad Michael MurrayNeither.
what was the last thing you said"I am studying!"
who would u want to be stuck in an elevator withI can think of a few people.
do you like stickersSure.
do u play with mad libs wen ur boredWhy do you spell so awfully?
are you suicidalNo.
is your window openNo.
what was the last pair of shoes you boughtI can't remember.
do you have a little brotherNo.
does he draw you cute picturesNo.
where do your grandparents liveThey're dead.
what do you think of when you hear the word clickMouse.
are you a moronHow dare a survey try to insult me.
do you like trampolinesHell yes.
have u ever accidentally sucked something up in the vacuumYeah...
did you see American Pie 2No.
do you cut yourselfNo.

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!


I was BORED.

Current Mood: sore
8 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Tuesday, October 4th, 2005
11:47 pm

I haven't been around much, and I haven't commented on my wonderful LJers' entries in a while. For this I am sorry. But with being pulled in so many directions at one time, it's been difficult to take a lot of time for this.

I have conflicitng emotions and words cannot describe the confusion I am feeling right now. I wasn't expecting something like this to ever happen. I feel like I should feel terrible, but I really don't. Everytime I see him... talk to him... hug him... I don't how to feel. Everything is upside down, and I don't know what to do.

I miss you and love you all. I am a terrible person.



Current Mood: confused
10 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
Sunday, October 2nd, 2005
9:35 pm
I love some of my Footloose people. When I am going crazy, they save me. I can't believe the amount of amazing people in this show. I can open up to them when I can't even open up to my family. I love them, and I am forever grateful for not being judged by those people.

Theatre people are wonderful. End of story.

<3

Current Mood: cheerful
i'll wait for you there
Friday, September 30th, 2005
10:05 am
i just made you up to hurt myself... and it worked. yes it did.
Why am I up as at such an ungodly hour? The answer is... my aunt called and asked if I wanted to go out to lunch. But she called at 9:10 AM, and we're not supposed to go till 12. Are people purposely trying to torture me? On one of my few days of freedom... someone wakes me up. I should be asleep right now, but unfortunately, my schedule is now all wacky and school accommodating from waking up at earlier hours. Damn it.

The past few days haven't been very eventful. The other night after rehearsal, I went and hung out at the always wonderful Chase's house. Since there was some crazy bad tension going on between some people (Who want to hump one another like woah. Kidding... I think.) back at the rehearsal workshop, the only other person who came was Nate, who is also in the play. I also met Chase's sister Abby. All very cool kids. I attempted to play "Science Fiction Double Feature" on their piano, but sadly I failed. Still fun, though.

I have to say that I am not very fond of how life is feeling right now. It's too... busy at times. I hate that. I'm too lazy for this sort of thing!

There are one or two things that make me feel better: Booze and hookers or just two hookers.

<3 I love you all.

Current Mood: asdfaksdlfjd!!!$3
i'll wait for you there
Monday, September 26th, 2005
10:52 pm
Summary of my life as of lately: Classes. Rehearsals. Homework. Sleep.

I'm also guilty of becoming a raging Myspace whore. It's dirty, I know. But it's so damn fun, too!

Thanks you guys...Collapse )

I have to get ready for bed. Gaaah.

<3 I love you all.

Current Mood: sleepy
4 like a stone| i'll wait for you there
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